Super Hush Hush Candidate Forum - Shhhhh Don't Tell Anyone

Well folks, now I've seen everything. I found out about what must be the most un-talked about, unheralded candidate forum ever in the annals of Wylie, Texas.  No seriously, did you even know about it?  I didn't think so.  In fact, I barely found out about it this morning because I stumbled upon it while perusing my Facebook page with its totally nondescript blip by The Wylie News.  In fact, hardly anybody knew about it as there had to be only about 12 people there. But then again, when only 3 candidates show up for for your forum, why would you bother? Clearly this was an afterthought because none of the other candidates could make it, well they didn't try real hard anyway, except Diane Culver, Bennie Jones, and Brooke Lopez.

Not only was this forum kept on the down low, but some total nincompoop down at The Wylie News told Diane Culver the wrong date for it, and someone else there sent Brooke Lopez an email with the wrong time on it causing her to show up late.   Nice.  I mean, what's the point of having a forum with all this ridiculousness?  You know you're running a losing battle when you set up a simple candidate forum and practically have the moderating League of Women Voters outnumber the attendees.

This stellar evening of unrestrained insight started with opening remarks and the award goes to... Diane Culver for blowing away the audience with her great insight into the workings at City Hall as well as her no-nonsense, I mean what I say and say what I mean style.  Well, blowing away everyone but the huffy Butschek's who have made it clear they have no intention of supporting any conservative candidates this silly season in Wylie.  I wouldn't call Bennie Jones conservative; he's squishy moderate at best, and their publicly stated support in the Wylie News of cat scratch fever lady Lisa Mellers seems a tad like a red-faced temper tantrum selection to me.  For the Libertarian-loving Ron Paul fans of yore to be turning out for a couple of flagrant liberals is just weird, and questionable.

Honestly, Diane Culver could have raised both of her arms in the air and performed a massive Barbie pose and she still would have won hearts.  She's cute and spunky, tells it like it is, and I still love her for it.

It was clear from the questions asked at this little, and I do mean little event, that each candidate had their posse there.  It totally cracked me up when a question came up asking if any of the candidates had been convicted of a misdemeanor or felony and Bennie got all brusk and snippy about it.  I thought I saw his eyes roll around in his head and steam come out of his ears as he spit out his, "I'm not perfect!"  I sat there imagining his other opponents stating their polite little, "No," while he was forced to lay out his younger, more stupid days before everyone.  Lucky for him they didn't ask the question I submitted or he would have been laying out his more recent, stupid days as well.

During the short evening we heard Diane, ripping her heart out and laying it there for everyone to see, Bennie pretty much telling you what you want to hear cuz, well, it's election season again and he has to, and Brooke with her uber-professional poised and practiced responses while chewing gum, because she's just so young that she hasn't been through the entire school of hard knocks that comes with age. But you know what?  For 18 she's doing remarkably well considering none of the other candidates bothered to show up.  I was wondering if that rather elusive Brad Emerson in the realtoresque campaign signs was actually a real person and not just a cardboard poster cutout.  Now I'm beginning to believe.

So here's the quick and dirty version for all you folks who missed this minuscule shindig, with my own flavor on those candidates not in attendance added for a little extra flair, and because I can:

Diane Culver wants you to know she is as fiscally responsible as ever and will continue working toward lowering our city tax rate by small, sustainable increments.  She puts principles over politics and isn't on council with a pet project, such as in the case of her opponent, doggie diva Lisa Mellers who seems to like her pets more than she likes the taxpayers. Culver is concerned that transportation will be the buzzword of the near future as Wylie is built-out with another 15K residents, and as the Intermodal Transportation System comes online, dumping 200+ semi-trucks a day on Highway 78. Gee, won't that be fun?

Brooke wants you to know she has ideas about measured growth, and wants to include the citizens of Wylie in much of the decision-making process as possible, and she is against further regulations on people's lives when she stated, "I beleive in personal freedoms." Conversely Bennie wants to ban Purple Haze and even texting while driving.  Brooke wants you to know she has even researched ways to get state and federal funding to help offset the high tax burden citizens have.

Jones wants you to know his greatest achievement is being a pohhlice man and that he cares about the kids and the families and feels he needs to take care of, "The people that's here now." He wants to focus on the kids and families and he has lots of, "unfinished business" to do, like bringing in those family entertainment venues he has been promising for at least 5 years now, but has been unsuccessful in achieving.  He also doesn't care about not being endorsed by anyone and was all prune-faced and butthole puckered about it.  Sounds a bit like sour grapes to me, especially after he made that slight rant after Diane Culver stated, "I've been to lots of meetings, CARGO, American Legion, and I was endorsed by Empower Texans for Fiscal Responsibility."  Wow, them grapes was bitter weren't they?

To which the totality of his responses prompting me to have a tornadic effect of exceedingly rude words swirling about in my head, looking for an escape route where the most politically correct comeback I can allow is why would we want to vote for Jones on that platform when we have a stellar candidate in Candy Arrington if you want someone who cares about the kids and families year round not just during campaign season.  It also prompts me to further ask, why would we want to vote for anyone but Brooke Lopez who has shown up at a multitude of meetings and events and has tried her level best compared to the slackers she is running against? Out of sheer will, and intestinal fortitude, Brooke has outshone Candy and Brad who haven't shown up for hardly any event during this campaign season. Do they even want to be elected?  Stymieing to be sure.

Bennie's statements remind me of a show on TV called Parks and Recreation where the character Ben Wyatt runs his tiny city into the ground after being elected Mayor, because he insists on putting a skating rink in, despite the citizens having no interest in it.  Reminds me a tad of Bennie's amphitheater he so desperately wants behind City Hall.

But the statement that absolutely takes the cake tonight was that from Councilman Bennie Jones who in his opening remarks talked about why he got into law enforcement, "In dealing with the youth in Wylie I could only get so much information. Now in law enforcement I get all the info."  Chilling yet with a decided air of raging bat shit crazy.

In all, there was probably only one person there who didn't know who they were voting for, making this meeting a phenomenal waste of time.  But then again, if it provides me fodder for my blog, I suppose all wasn't lost.